Dumb criminals at work

[Rewind]

Sometimes somebody you never would have expected turns out to be a dumb criminal. Witness:

To Catch A Predator host Chris Hansen arrested over bounced checks
NBC News, Jan 16 2019

Chris Hansen was arrested Monday in his hometown of Stamford, Connecticut. He turned himself in to police after a warrant was issued for his arrest on a felony charge of issuing bad checks.

Hansen hosted NBC's Dateline series To Catch A Predator from 2004 to 2007. He also hosted spinoffs To Catch An ID Thief and To Catch A Con Man. In 2015, Hansen launched a kickstarter campaign to fund a new show, Hansen vs. Predator. In 2017, Hansen bought $13,000 worth of promotional items including hats, shirts and mugs from a local company. The items were offered as incentives for people to donate. Hansen paid for the merchandise with a check that bounced. In April 2018, he gave the business owner another check. That one bounced, too. A warrant was issued for his arrest after he refused to talk to police. Hansen has been released without bond and upon a written promise to appear in court.

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news...ounced-n959471

[Rewind]

The charges (above) against Chris Hansen were dismissed today after his lawyer presented evidence that Hansen had indeed made the disputed payments. Today we have a dummy who fled on foot after a traffic stop and thought he could evade police by running across a pasture. He was wrong.

Fleeing suspect chased through Florida field by horses

https://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2019/01...1801547834081/

[Rewind]

After this thief crashed the car, he had two choices: Stay in the vehicle or try to get away. He tried to get away. That might have been the better choice -- but it wasn't better by much.

Footprints in snow led police from stolen car right to suspect

https://nypost.com/2019/03/05/footpr...ht-to-suspect/

[Rewind]

This story says the driver in the carpool lane had two dummies in his SUV. I'd say there were three dummies in the vehicle.

Three-time Bay area carpool cheat busted again for riding with a pair of dummies

https://www.latimes.com/local/lanow/...308-story.html

[Rewind]

On July 2, 1962, the first Walmart store opened in Rogers, Arkansas. I wonder if that's where these two idiots in Rogers bought their .22-caliber rifle.

Arkansas men arrested for taking turns shooting at each other while wearing bulletproof vest after drinking

https://www.newsweek.com/charles-eug...f-vest-1384395

[Rewind]

This article includes the store's beautiful, high-definition, full-color surveillance video of this shoplifting schmuck. I wonder if he lost any body parts on his way home.

Fresno man steals chainsaw by stuffing it in his pants

https://www.yourcentralvalley.com/cr...nts/1900967749

[Rewind]

This schmuck should have an entry in the next Guinness Book Of World Records for "world's quickest recidivism."

Minutes after being released from jail, a Florida man was arrested in the parking lot for breaking into cars

https://www-m.cnn.com/2019/04/05/us/...eft/index.html

[Rewind]

Florida. Of course it's Florida.

Florida man pretended to be an officer, then tried to pull over an undercover cop
An undercover officer called dispatch after a man in a white SUV tried to pull him over using a red and blue light bar on his car.

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news...rcover-n996791

[Rewind]

He couldn't have just tried to find the recipe in one of Paula Deen's or Ina Garten's cookbooks?

Illinois man sentenced to prison for ordering 42 pounds of marijuana-infused chocolate

https://www.cnn.com/2019/06/09/us/il...na-possession/

[Rewind]

This Connecticut man was hoping nobody would tell anyone he was trying to smuggle finches – but the birds sang. (Yeah, I know that was bad.)

Man arrested after customs officials find 34 singing finches hidden in plastic hair curlers

https://www.cnn.com/2019/06/17/polit...ana/index.html