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Thread: Joke of the day

  1. #31
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    On a Friday night in December, Don took his girlfriend to Armando's Jewelers and told her to pick out anything she wanted. He said, "This will be your Christmas present." She picked up a 24-karat gold ring with several small rubies and diamonds around it and said, "Oh, this is stunning. It's beautiful!" Armando said, "That ring is $27,000." Don told him, "No problem. I'll write you a check. On Monday, after the check clears, I'll come in and pick up the ring." Armando said that would be fine. On Monday afternoon, Armando phoned Don and complained, "Your check bounced!" Don replied, "I knew it would, but let me tell you about my great weekend!"

  2. #32
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    A rancher goes to the local veterinarian and says, "I have a horse. Sometimes he walks normally and sometimes he limps. What should I do?" The veterinarian tells him, "The next time he walks normally, sell him."

  3. #33
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    I know I'm not the only one here who knows a lot of funny jokes but this thread has become my own personal humor blog. Where is everyone? How about some participation? Please?

    A man and a boy go into a barber shop. After the man gets a haircut, he puts the boy in the barber chair. Then he says, "I'm going to go to the drugstore on the corner and get a pack of gum." The barber gives the boy a haircut but the man still hasn't returned. The barber says, "It looks like your dad has forgotten you." The boy replies, "That wasn't my dad. He just saw me on the sidewalk, grabbed me by the hand and said, 'Come on, we're both going to get a free haircut.'"

  4. #34
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    Walt, a traveling salesman, had been driving for several hours and was very tired, so he decided to pull over to the side of the road and take a nap in his car. He had been asleep just a few minutes when a jogger stopped and rapped on the window, waking him up. Walt asked, "What do you want?" The jogger asked, "Do you have the time?" Walt said "It's 8:15" and went back to sleep. A few minutes later, another jogger came by, rapped on the window, woke him up and asked, "Do you have the time?" Walt told him "It's 8:30." Walt then wrote "I don't have the time" on a sheet of paper and taped it to the window and went back to sleep.

    Ten minutes later, another jogger came by, rapped on the window, woke him up and said "It's 8:40."

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